Today was a very unique day. Today I was able to communicate with others like my struggling self and talk about the angst
of not being able to write. It was comforting to know that I am not alone 
and that I have a solution to my own block when it suddenly appears out of nowhere. I know this because I was able to share what I do when I can't write.
Since the beginning of the year all I have been able to write is this blog
. My ability to write for my living has slowed to nearly nothing. Over the past weeks I have written about feelings, voices in my head, conflicts that don't have satisfactory resolutions and as I wrote all these blogs I have been struggling to earn my living writing. When we beat ourselves up because we wilt at the mere thought of sitting at the laptop or pulling out the old manuscript we are playing the tapes of all those times when we convinced ourselves that we just couldn't do it.
As a writer I struggle not to seek approval from others. I struggle to write
just for me regardless of who reads me. Today I networked with other writers who struggle like I do with unfinished manuscripts in the drawer, the inability to listen to that inner voice and to believe that I can honor the commitment I made to myself to write on a daily basis.
M. Scott Peck, M.D. wrote, "Although the act of nurturing another's spiritual growth has the effect of nurturing one's own, a major characteristic of genuine love is that the distinction between oneself and the other is always maintained and preserved." As writers we must learn how to nurture our spirit with the same compassion we nurture the spirit of our characters. I have fallen in love with some of the characters I write because I am able to make the distinction of where I end and they begin. I fall in love with who they are and who they are becoming not who I think they should be or wish they were.
I am successful in writing characters and developing a nurturing relationship with them because I let them roam freely on my laptop screen. I don't control where they go or who they are. I let them become the people they are meant to be. In my daily commitment to write I am encouraging my characters to develop into full well-rounded people. The relationship I develop with my characters is interdependent. We need each other's presence so that we may become the people we are meant to be.
As the writer I am a separate individual from my characters even though they are a reflection of my life. I must learn how to overcome my struggles to write as my characters learn how to overcome their struggles. We are interdependent finding the solution to our struggles alone while being dependent on each other for the solution.
As I keep my commitment to write daily I am becoming more secure and I am recognizing my accomplishments more and more. The first accomplishment is that I am writing at this moment. The second is I didn't cave to the self-battering that stops me from writing; the block to me is a period of self-battering. The block is a time when someone or something around me has triggered a feeling that didn't even register in my conscious mind
, but it is there eating at me from the inside out preventing me from writing. Until I discover what that feeling is, accept it and then move through the feeling with the daily grind of writing I will not be free to write.
The time spent alone writing is more difficult than the actual task of writing. There are times when my mind is a dangerous place to be and the last place I should be is alone. If everyone could spend time alone there would be more writers, but not everyone can. When I am living in unison with my surroundings I am able to write without fear, angst or self-doubt.
My job as a writer is to remain calm in the eye of the storm around me. When I am calm I am free to relive an experience and write how the experience feels. Did you hear me? When I am calm I can write..............
of not being able to write. It was comforting to know that I am not alone and that I have a solution to my own block when it suddenly appears out of nowhere. I know this because I was able to share what I do when I can't write. Since the beginning of the year all I have been able to write is this blog
. My ability to write for my living has slowed to nearly nothing. Over the past weeks I have written about feelings, voices in my head, conflicts that don't have satisfactory resolutions and as I wrote all these blogs I have been struggling to earn my living writing. When we beat ourselves up because we wilt at the mere thought of sitting at the laptop or pulling out the old manuscript we are playing the tapes of all those times when we convinced ourselves that we just couldn't do it.As a writer I struggle not to seek approval from others. I struggle to write
just for me regardless of who reads me. Today I networked with other writers who struggle like I do with unfinished manuscripts in the drawer, the inability to listen to that inner voice and to believe that I can honor the commitment I made to myself to write on a daily basis. M. Scott Peck, M.D. wrote, "Although the act of nurturing another's spiritual growth has the effect of nurturing one's own, a major characteristic of genuine love is that the distinction between oneself and the other is always maintained and preserved." As writers we must learn how to nurture our spirit with the same compassion we nurture the spirit of our characters. I have fallen in love with some of the characters I write because I am able to make the distinction of where I end and they begin. I fall in love with who they are and who they are becoming not who I think they should be or wish they were.
I am successful in writing characters and developing a nurturing relationship with them because I let them roam freely on my laptop screen. I don't control where they go or who they are. I let them become the people they are meant to be. In my daily commitment to write I am encouraging my characters to develop into full well-rounded people. The relationship I develop with my characters is interdependent. We need each other's presence so that we may become the people we are meant to be.
As the writer I am a separate individual from my characters even though they are a reflection of my life. I must learn how to overcome my struggles to write as my characters learn how to overcome their struggles. We are interdependent finding the solution to our struggles alone while being dependent on each other for the solution.
As I keep my commitment to write daily I am becoming more secure and I am recognizing my accomplishments more and more. The first accomplishment is that I am writing at this moment. The second is I didn't cave to the self-battering that stops me from writing; the block to me is a period of self-battering. The block is a time when someone or something around me has triggered a feeling that didn't even register in my conscious mind
, but it is there eating at me from the inside out preventing me from writing. Until I discover what that feeling is, accept it and then move through the feeling with the daily grind of writing I will not be free to write. The time spent alone writing is more difficult than the actual task of writing. There are times when my mind is a dangerous place to be and the last place I should be is alone. If everyone could spend time alone there would be more writers, but not everyone can. When I am living in unison with my surroundings I am able to write without fear, angst or self-doubt.
My job as a writer is to remain calm in the eye of the storm around me. When I am calm I am free to relive an experience and write how the experience feels. Did you hear me? When I am calm I can write..............
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