Day Twenty-Two

Why didn't I write this morning? Why did I wait until tonight knowing I would be numb by then? Why can't I get back to the place where I was all enthused and filled with hope? Because it didn’t come from within it came from the outside.
A wise man told me a couple of weeks ago that I have to fit life in between my writing times and not fit my writing times in between my life. I have always known this is the discipline it takes to be a successful writer. I just have been too distracted in relationships with friends, family and partners to be successful. Our life and their life have always been more important. I don’t value what I have to say because I don’t know what I have to say. I even struggle with this in earning a living writing forget the creative writing. I never understood why I couldn’t have both—still don’t understand why I can’t have both.
It amazes me how empty my head and heart can become at times. That’s all I have for tonight. I wrote this blog and today I have to be satisfied with that. Every day I keep this blog going is a successful day. Hopefully by the end of the year I will have said something worth publishing. Good night….